What's wrong with this logo?

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Anagoge is offline
Graphic Designer
345 Posts
Liverpool
What's wrong with this logo?

I've tried for the past five hours to refine this to a point which I'm happy with but with no luck. I don't like asking for outside help (always satisfying to solve something on your own) but on this occasion, I'm stumped and I'd appreciate your help.

I'm designing some wedding invitations. This logo is not a logo for a business, but a wedding. The bride asked me to include butterflies and "C&D" in some way. The butterfly makes up C&D.

My original attempt at the logo:

Click the image to open in full size.

After applying the logo to the invitations, I started to dislike what I'd come up with and thought it could look better. The logo was chosen before the typeface was and so there was a definite lack of synergy between the two. After refining it, this is what I've come up with:

Click the image to open in full size.

I'm still not happy with it, however. The typeface (Bickham) is script but the logo looks too calligraphic to me. This is where I need your help. What would you change about the logo?

It goes without saying that the logo needs to retain the look of a C and a D and the overall look of a butterfly. The body (The ampersand, if you like) is open to changes, but obviously still needs to resemble an ampersand on some level.

Hopefully you can give me some advice as this is definitely one I'm stuck on.

Thanks.



The Work Of Neil Martin
http://www.theworkof.co.uk

Last edited by Anagoge; 04-07-10 at 12:14 AM..
  Quote Post 1 Posted 03-07-10
mrp2049 is offline
Hopeless Case
4,694 Posts
Cardiff
I think you could risk making the wings rounder and perhaps give them a bit more breathing room around the and/body.

I am just logging in quickly, if I have a chance in the morning, I'll get my tablet out and show you if my description doesnt make sense.


  Quote Post 2 Posted 04-07-10
Renniks is offline
Shmoo
2,335 Posts
Cardiff
I'd also look at inverting the colours of the logo part on the top one... while I realise the point is bringing to light the C & D it would probably make it look better while still being there for anyone who notices it



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  Quote Post 3 Posted 04-07-10
Tom Sound is offline
Senior Member
1,602 Posts
Teddington, Middx
Quote:
Originally Posted by mrp2049 View Post
I think you could risk making the wings rounder

That was my initial thought too, by making the wings resemble a C and D in a squareish font, it effects the softness of the butterfly shape, if you made them rounded it would look more like a C and D and maybe use the W and M from their surnames to create the second element of each wing.

just a quicky but something like this....

Click the image to open in full size.

I really like the body though


  Quote Post 4 Posted 04-07-10
Anagoge is offline
Graphic Designer
345 Posts
Liverpool
I totally agree with the suggestion that it needed to be a little rounded. But, I also quite like the way the wings bend slightly in the outside middle to give the impression that there's four wings instead of two. With that in mind, I've rounded the wings a touch more and I think this is getting somewhere.

Click the image to open in full size.
It's a touch softer than the previous version. I think it's working better.

I've also tried variations of the body:
Click the image to open in full size.

I think the original (top left) works the best or perhaps bottom left.



The Work Of Neil Martin
http://www.theworkof.co.uk
  Quote Post 5 Posted 04-07-10
Tony is offline
Senior Member
260 Posts
If you hadn't told me that the wings were meant to be a C and a D then I wouldn't have known. The body looks more like an 8 than an ampersand. I'd decrease the spacing of the surnames as they seem to be wider than the first names atm, on my iPhone anyway.

Sorry if this sounds like a harsh critique, it's not meant in that manner, just trying to help.

Maybe have a look at the OCC - Orange County Choppers logo for some inspiration as that is a logo with letters flowing to create a shape.

Also do some hand drawings and scan them in, this brief sounds like the perfect time for a natural floral style.

  Quote Post 6 Posted 04-07-10
Greg is offline
Freelancer/Team DF
4,881 Posts
Kent, UK
I know this is going to sound a bit strange, and doesn't go with alphabetical or bride & groom order, but how about the letters the other way round? So DC as you would then get the body shape of the butterfly from the letters and the wing shapes come from the curls off the letters.

IMO the wings themselves look too rounded atm, so rather than being a D shape, they're actually more B shaped as they come in, in the middle, if that makes sense?



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  Quote Post 7 Posted 04-07-10
Levi is offline
It's cold outside
3,488 Posts
Norfolk
the problem in my view is the butterfly wings don't look like butterfly wings which normally are in 2 parts and have an indent in the middle (think half an upside figure 8)

I would try pinching in the middle of each wing more and making the 'pinch' lower down due to their being a bigger and smaller wing



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the light grey text is just explaining things so as to try and avoid misunderstanding
  Quote Post 8 Posted 04-07-10
mrp2049 is offline
Hopeless Case
4,694 Posts
Cardiff
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greg View Post
I know this is going to sound a bit strange, and doesn't go with alphabetical or bride & groom order, but how about the letters the other way round? So DC as you would then get the body shape of the butterfly from the letters and the wing shapes come from the curls off the letters.

IMO the wings themselves look too rounded atm, so rather than being a D shape, they're actually more B shaped as they come in, in the middle, if that makes sense?
I think Greg has the nail here!

Just look at the most famous dc combo logo.

Click the image to open in full size.

by pulling the verticals in a bit, you could well by away!


  Quote Post 9 Posted 05-07-10
Anagoge is offline
Graphic Designer
345 Posts
Liverpool
Great idea Greg, but unfortunately it has to be C&D in that order! It's a long story, but it's basically an in-joke amongst the bride's friends that if there's a houseparty, it's at "Club C&D" rather than "Claire & Dave's". Totally agree that this would look great, but unfortunately it's not an option!

A few evolutions of the logo so far:

Click the image to open in full size.

I think the main reason why I'm pulled to the current (bottom left) logo is because the wings are nice and big and much bigger than the body and they're at least starting to give the impressed that they're pinched slightly in the middle to create two sets of wings, rather than one. The more you pinch, however, the more you begin to lose the D and the more it becomes a B instead.

The clients get the first viewing of the logo/invitations tomorrow so I have today to work on this. It doesn't matter too much if it's not refined to perfection, but it'd be nice to have something better than what I currently have. I'll be working on this all of today.



The Work Of Neil Martin
http://www.theworkof.co.uk
  Quote Post 10 Posted 05-07-10
Tom Sound is offline
Senior Member
1,602 Posts
Teddington, Middx
Second row, third one in for me then


  Quote Post 11 Posted 05-07-10
Renniks is offline
Shmoo
2,335 Posts
Cardiff
I was thinking second row one of the first 3 personally



Learn the rules - so you know how to break them properly
Simplicity is the ultimate form of sophistication
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  Quote Post 12 Posted 05-07-10
Levi is offline
It's cold outside
3,488 Posts
Norfolk
As my suggestion seemed to get missed I will try again.

Take design 3 from row 1 and flip the wings upside down and then just play with the 'pinch' This will give the wings the natural shape that a butterfly would have, well one with this type of wing



Image Resolutions - update is currently in progress.
the light grey text is just explaining things so as to try and avoid misunderstanding
  Quote Post 13 Posted 05-07-10
Greg is offline
Freelancer/Team DF
4,881 Posts
Kent, UK
Quote:
Originally Posted by Levi View Post
As my suggestion seemed to get missed I will try again.

Take design 3 from row 1 and flip the wings upside down and then just play with the 'pinch' This will give the wings the natural shape that a butterfly would have, well one with this type of wing
I don't think it was missed Levi, similar point that I was making too, and Neil responded here

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anagoge View Post
they're pinched slightly in the middle to create two sets of wings, rather than one. The more you pinch, however, the more you begin to lose the D and the more it becomes a B instead



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  Quote Post 14 Posted 05-07-10
Levi is offline
It's cold outside
3,488 Posts
Norfolk
maybe the response was generalised but the designs still missed my suggestion completely as the wings all look upside down to me, butterflies have a bigger wing at the top/front and smaller at the rear, all the designs 'look' the other way round.

As to the pinch, the indent is only one aspect of it, you can play with it's shape, it's location on the wing so there's plenty of little things you can adjust till you're happy.



Image Resolutions - update is currently in progress.
the light grey text is just explaining things so as to try and avoid misunderstanding
  Quote Post 15 Posted 05-07-10
 
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